Random Stories, Conversations, E-mails, and Things I Like to Talk About.

Today’s Conversation: Dating Deal Breakers: The Male Perspective

You can love your cat…but guys don’t want to hear about it.

Last week, I wrote about “deal breakers” when dating.  If you missed it, go here.  I went to some of my girlfriends to get their responses last week and they came up with a list of deal breakers that I posted on Bloggersations.

After that post, I had guys wanting to offer their “deal breakers” as well, along with many guys who were extremely offended and upset about what women had to say.  Ladies, just so you know, I learned something new…guys get offended when you discuss their footwear.  Hence this response: “’I'd love to find the chick that wrote that and watch her turn down Brad Pitt for wearing a pair of K-Swiss, funny how girls’ morals go right out the window for any celeb,” or this response, “But **** like shoes is incredibly stupid. I’m a man, I don’t give a **** about shoes. I have 1 pair of shoes and a pair or steel-toed work boots. That’s it.”

One guy even said, “I groom, I shave my nether-region, I wear deodorant and cologne on special occasion. My clothes match and I look decent, that’s all that is needed.”

I figured it is only fair to post a male’s perspective on here, so ladies…listen up!

Deal Breakers When Dating Women:

1. Lack of personal hygiene: This is the ultimate deal breaker.  You can mess up on anything on a date, but nothing on earth can salvage the date if you have horrible hygiene.  If you breath is kickin’ during our date, I can only imagine how it smells in the morning.
2. Lack of general attraction
3. Ladies, stop expecting men to dress well and “have a sense of fashion” because that’s what YOU think is important
4. I don’t expect girls to be good at computer games or to be able to assist me in welding a trailer, so don’t expect me to buy dress shoes and watch “Sex and the City” with you
5. You wouldn’t like it if I stole the spotlight from you anyway…women are made to look spectacular, not men.
6. Unemployed single moms – this is just begging for a father figure/financial supplier, and not so much a boyfriend
7. Overweight/obesity or super skinny - A woman who has no concern for her body or her health, would have no concern for ours.  It also screams there is emotional / mental trauma.  Guys are simple…we seek simplicity and stability.
8. Talking about your cat…we get really sick of hearing about the cat.  You might have 400 Facebook pictures of “Mr. Meowington”, but that is just a starting block to becoming a crazy cat lady.
9. Talking about your ex-boyfriend, which goes hand-in-hand with hanging out with the ex.  If he’s on your mind, it means feelings still exist – whether you believe so or not, we know better.
10. Texting or talking on your phone during a date
11. Expecting the guy to always pay
12. When the girl is TOO into a guy – almost obsessive.  I’ve been cornered before and got yelled at for not asking someone out on a date
13. Talking about how much you hook up (see point 18)
14. Dirty car/junk filled up in the car – it’s a sign that your house is probably the same.  I’ve lived in a fraternity house and know how disgusting it gets, but it pales in comparison to some girls’ bathrooms I’ve been in.
15. Overbearing / nagging
16. Too much makeup – we seriously think you are prettier with barely any makeup on
17. Complaining about your hair…too long, or short, or too blonde, etc.
18. Saying “I’ve never done this before.”  Yes you have.  We know you have…and you know exactly what I’m referring to.  (I have heard this line at least 10 times.)  And now we know you are a liar.
19. Girl has “daddy issues” – “a woman has daddy issues when she appears to be seeking attention from men in order to compensate for the attention she may not have received from her father. When we talk about her daddy issues, we’re generally talking about things like aggressive flirtation, promiscuity, a tendency toward exhibitionism, and certain emotional hang-ups.”
20. Girl makes more money
21. Girl has higher education
22. When a girl talks too much or throughout the whole date. On a date, there should be reciprocity. If I’m on a date with a girl and she talks the whole time or about herself too much, then I take it as a sign that she is either self-centered or insecure. A girl should want to get to know the guy too and there should be balance. If there isn’t a balance, it’s a no-go.
23. When a girl doesn’t concentrate on the date: The fact that you constantly check your phone, answer text messages or call people incessantly pretty much tells me you’re not into me.  It’s our first date, and I don’t know you enough to compete with your phone.
24. When a girl isn’t polite on a date, that’s a deal breaker.
25. If a woman still wears a name tag and a walkie-talkie to work, that’s a deal breaker.
26. A girl who constantly makes fun of or is rude to other people.  It shows me how you’ll treat me later on in the relationship.
27. When a girl wears Abercrombie and Fitch to the nightclub
28. When a girl tells stories with names of people who you have never met, but she expects you to know who these people are
29. A negative attitude: The fact that you haven’t smiled all night isn’t a good thing.  If I’m the only one talking the whole night, that also isn’t a good thing.  The fact that you’re criticizing every little thing I do also tells me that you won’t be enjoying the things I enjoy doing.  If you showed me that it’s been a positive experience spending time with you, believe me, I’ll ask you out again on a second date.
30. When she gets crabby because of a headache, but refuses to take Advil, that’s a deal breaker
31. When she chooses “March Madness” as a time to watch hours of America’s Next Top Model marathons
32. Don’t turn the date into an interview: I get it, you’re looking for a potential boyfriend.  The way I see it, if we click, it’ll happen.  So let it flow and enjoy the night.  If neither of us enjoyed it, it’s pretty much an indication there’s not going to be a second date.
33. When a woman doesn’t offer or attempt to pay for something on the first date
34. When she says “like” way too much
35. After a first date if no kiss on the cheek or peck on the lips is given, that equals no second date…you have to show that you’re at least interested and not leave us guessing whether we should call again or not
36. If she wears a turtle neck within the first few dates.  I don’t care if it’s cold, that’s why they made coats
37. If you sneeze and she doesn’t say, “bless you” or some variation of that
38. If you take her to eat and she just orders a salad
39. If you take her out to eat and she orders something that says “market price” on the menu or something that is clearly one of the most expensive items on the menu
40. If you don’t have automatic locks on your car, and you unlock the passenger side door and open it for her and she doesn’t reach across to unlock your side…thank you Bronx Tale!

To end this post, I wanted to post this comment, “Wait what’s wrong with cargo shorts? Am I supposed to be wearing jean shorts (jorts) during the summer?”  The answer is NO.  Do not wear jorts…ever.

Thank you for all who took part in this post…I’d love to hear more feedback!